Cómo hacerse profesional en 3 días

Encontré este artículo navegando por internet (aquí). Si no somos todavía profesionales es porque no seguimos la metodología adecuada.

Esto es lo que hay que hacer para convertirse en pro y no mirar atrás nunca más:

Day One. Go shopping.

First on the list, and probably the most important step in this process, buy a nice pair of sunglasses. Some things to consider when picking out your sunglasses:

1. Does the shape of the glasses fit my head?
2. Do they look equally as good if I just wear them on the top of my head?
3. How do they look if I’m wearing a ball cap or earphones?

Second - Ipod. Almost as important as the sunglasses, an Ipod is a must for any aspiring pro. They add to the table image you are trying to create of being super good. Emphasis on super. Plus - everyone at the table will see the drama unfolding in any hand you’re playing as you take a moment to turn the volume down or pull the earplug out of your ear. Sometimes you can even be tricky and have the earphones in your ears like your listening to music, but you aren’t, and you’ll hear every word at the table as if you didn’t even have them in. And nobody will even know!

One thing to remember about your Ipod and listening at the table: if anybody asks you what you are listening to, no matter what you are really listening to, whether it’s the Beatles or Marley or Modest Mouse, always answer Skynard.

Third, you’ll need at least one really bad hawaiian shirt and at least one poker shirt that says something to the effect of how good you are and how bad your opponents are. Or just have it say something like “I’m all in!” with a picture of some aces or something.

Day Two. Study study study.

You’ll need to read some poker books. There are a lot of books out there, but what you’re looking for is any book by any player that you’ve seen on T.V. A good one to start with is Phil Hellmuth’s Play Poker Like the Pros. See - you can play just like them by reading this book. As you skim through the book - make sure to especially pay attention to any tables or graphs that have any sort of mathematical basis, or the words “Pot Odds” above them. Pot Odds is an important concept to be able to at least seem like you understand. It will show how good of a player you are. Make sure that at least once a session you fold to a bet on the turn, and as you muck your cards say something like “Well I had the flush draw, but I wasn’t getting the right odds, good bet good bet.” Your opponents will be impressed.

Another thing to remember is that quotes are important. Check out the movie Roundersand make sure you know all of the good lines. Be ready to recite them at the table as situations come up that somewhat resemble what happens in the movie. If you can do an impression of John Malkovich as Teddy KGB, even better. You’ll surely get a bunch of smiles from the other guys at the table.

T.V. Watch all of the WPT events on the Travel Channel and be well versed in High StakesPoker on GSN. And of course you should Tivo all of the World Series events on ESPN. Make sure while watching poker on television while you’re at a poker table to point out certain key hands on the t.v. and say something like, “Oh yeah, this hand is sick - this is where that dude hits a two outer on the river and knocks Ivey out. That’s sick. Just sick.”

Day Three. Chip Tricks.

I can’t say enough about chip tricks. The shuffle, the thumb flip, the drop and spin, and the roll. These are the basics, get them down - if you don’t know what I’m referring to - don’t quit your job, you’re definitely not ready. You might have the glasses and ipod, but if you don’t have a good “drop and spin” move down for those moments when you get raised, you’ll never make it.

Never do tricks with both hands while participating in the hand. If you have cards, you should only perform tricks in one hand as you contemplate a bet or a raise. You’ll need at least one free hand to count out chips with while you shuffle chips in the other hand.

Also, practice chip stacking. It’s super important to have a few designs prepared before you go to play at the casino. If you need some help - remember the basics: the wall, the towers, and the pyramid. These are all standard, but you can’t go wrong with any of these.

There you have it - the secrets to become a pro spelled out for you. Start on a Monday, be a pro on Thursday. Good luck and just remember - if anybody beats you in a hand they’re really just another donkey. You can tell them that too as they’re stacking your chips.